Tag: coconut

The Magic King of the Coconut Kingdom

The Cognitive Model

“What were you two yapping about and giggling about the whole time?” the husband said, peering into a photograph at the upanayanam ceremony. 

He might have been short of breath after reciting and repeating endless mantras, but the children & I were short of breath trying to hold in our laughter several times – mainly because we had more time on our hands and little to do while on stage. 

“Well – which time? We got into trouble several times with everyone!” I giggled.

“Pick one!”

“Well Fine! I’ll tell you. This is when this fellow said, ‘If ever there was a time to run a cognitive interpretation model and turn the chanting into tonal bits, and then try to get  a translated gist, this is it.’ – That was so like him, that I couldn’t stop laughing. And then everybody shushed me!”

The husband gave the son an amused look, and then said, “Was that what he was saying? It sounded like a song!”

“Well – yes, he was singing. What were you singing?”I said, rounding on the son. I remember the whole hall giving me the pursed-lip and furrowed-brow routine, for his lip sync was clearly off from what his father was droning on the other side of me.

“Oh – that!” 

“Please don’t tell me you were singing Hamilton!” I said.

“Well – phew! Then I won’t get in trouble. No! I was not singing Hamilton, Amma!”

The Magic Coconut Kingdom

I raised my eyebrows and he said, in a somewhat more  abashed tone of voice, “First, I thought the coconut looked funny – like a wizard coconut, with a magic hat. The king of the coconut kingdom!” he puffed his chest out, and his ribs pushed out from under his shirt.

They had decorated that coconut very fancifully. I remember thinking to myself that the coconut looked marvelous. Even without all of this, the coconut is a swell thing, but with some stripes of ash across its face, a huge red dot on its handsome visage, and a silk turban like hat, dashing was the word. #Kalasam

“So, anyway, I imagined the coconut using its magic powers to fight the flames from the fire.. The coconut king, friends with the liquid ghee, used to fan the fire onwards and well – you know how it is, right amma?”

I nodded indeed. The coconut, in combination with the fumes, and the silks on one’s body is fertile ground for fanciful thinking. The chanting in the background can be very soothing for the imagination to pound on. 

Epiphanies of Spiritual Visions?

Religious rituals in Hinduism have a curious character – they rely heavily on the men to perform them, but need the women to hover and lend support at all times. The upanayanam ceremony is no different. The son had nothing to do but indulge in his childish dreams for the first hour or so. 

I wrote about it briefly here: Upanayanam: Insights into a traditional ceremony

Behind every beautiful moment are hundreds of moments leading up to it. The decorations, the coming together of everything in one swoop, the invites, availability of people and dates, and so much more. For one event to happen, even if the hero/heroine of the event is unaware, it means combined efforts from many people – mostly loved ones.

When finally it all comes together, there is much chatter, excitement, frazzled feelings, tension, drama, joy, laughter. Then, just when you wonder what to make of it all, out of the blue, a moment of rare insight, like peeking into a well, and catching the glimpse of a fish for an instant, appears before you.

If it was the coconut that gave that to the son, so be it. 

For me, it was the son’s quip on the cognitive model to apply to the tonal information. 

I hope the husband and daughter found that moment too. They must have judging by the looks of surprised happiness the pictures seem to get a glimpse of.

Dishwasher Chronicles Part 3

I have always wondered how it must be to be an agriculturist. What if you had fields of coconut trees and jackfruit trees? How do you detect from the outside given the rough and tough exterior of the produce if it is ready for harvest or not? Let’s take coconuts for example. Do you gaze up at the trees and think, “That big one over yonder looks big and green enough, so it must be ready.” . Then, you go fetch some ropes, hoist yourself up there and sever it from its tree and plop open its head.

What if, after all this bother, you find it still has another week before its prime time? You can’t seal it closed again and attach it back to the tree, can you?

coconut farmer

Examined from this angle, I suppose, the plight of modern dishwasher users is better than that of a coconut farmer at harvest time. Though, the methods are the same.

You still need to hoist yourself at a safe distance from the dishwasher to determine whether it is done or not, for the only way to find out whether the dishes are done is to plop open the dishwasher. If it is not done, you run the risk of having the dirty or partly clean water give you a splash. All the controls and progress indicators are set on the top panel which slides out of view when the dishwasher is closed remember? I must say, the husband is the most skilled at this among us. The rest of us baboon around till there is water on the floor and are still unable to see how much of the task remains.

As was so often the case, the dishwasher stopped midway through and the husband’s skill-sets were increasingly called upon. Initially, he was able to tell us how much of the cycle was done.  He would say, ’23 minutes remaining’, so just switch it on again, or ’46 minutes 30 seconds left, let’s just do the dishes’ and dash away from the premises for an (ahem) important meeting. But later on, he professed ignorance. I don’t think this kind of degradation of service is acceptable anywhere. How can you go from giving the exact number of minutes and seconds remaining to nothing? There was much murmuring and looks-exchanging at this.

The parents-in-law accosted him one morning and said enough was enough. Either he shouted at the person he got on the phone, or they would call the nice fellow who came last time and assured them in Spanish about the parrots-liking-green-tea and ask him for explanations. The husband looked cornered – there were three belligerent-looking blokes/blokees demanding explanations or a new dishwasher. He buckled and said he would do his best to shout at the customer service representative.

I caught his eye and couldn’t help smiling. The husband may be the head agriculturist if ever we become coconut farmers or jackfruit orchard owners. But he shall not be the one shouting at the coconut if it is not yet ripe. I gave him a much needed cup of coffee from a cup picked up from the dishwasher and sent him on his war.

I have a sneaking suspicion on what happened on the call and this, I shall share, with you all in the next blog entry.