Has anyone eaten Durian?

Durian: The King of Fruits

I spent the whole day with my nose puckered up to avoid the strong stench emanating from my neighbouring cubicle. To me the smell (or stench!) was over-bearing. A close enough description would be: When one takes heavy antibiotics, and also take B-complex tablets along with it, this stench seems to be there in one’s pee! In one word: unpleasant!

My colleagues told me it was Durian flavoured wafers that gave that smell. They tried hard to sell durian cookies to me – if you can just shut the smell out, and eat it, it will be lovely. One or to adventurous ones tried it, and endorsed their claims of it being very tasty. But my nose (I have had reason to comment on the length of my dear bulb on several occasions, so I shall refrain) is just too sharp for that sort of thing. I wiki-ed Durian, and found it looks like a jackfruit, and is supposed to taste great.

Interesting piece of info that I could not cross-verify anywhere: apparently eating durian in Thailand in Public is banned, though Thailand is a major exporter of Durian – all thanks to its distinctive odour!

If anyone does try Durian despite the smell, do let me know how it tastes.

“Hey! How are you?” I hear a genuinely surprised voice. A familiar face comes into focus, and my bleary mind finally places the face as one of the commuters I used to see everyday on the public transit. I remember talking to her once or twice, but the details of the conversations are blotched out. Gone. Erased. Clean slate.

My expression has turned from a dazed one into a smile that shows vague recognition, as I reply – “Good…how are you? I haven’t see you in a long time!”

I can feel my nerves rattle like a toy held over the head of a giggling 4 month old, as she remembers how far my workspot is from the transit terminal, the name of my office, and even my daughter. She fondly asks after my daughter, and I am still trying to get her name! How I wish my brain had a search functionality that could access archived areas of the “past” database.

I remember she has children, and ask vague questions about their well-being. I hope she doesn’t sense my desperation, but I am sure she does. I hastily take leave, still wracking my brain. It starts with an ‘N’ – I start down the path of listing all the names I know starting with ‘N’ and cross them out with plausible explanations. I know this will nag me till the next time a similar incident happens, and I start out with another alphabet.

I read somewhere that names can be remembered if you wish to remember it. But here is the thing: I seldom ask anyone’s name with the intention of not remembering it. I want to remember it, I can’t.

Any pointers to help me would be greatly appreciated.

Disneyland: A trip to the magical kingdom

Every time I go to Disneyland, I become a small girl again. This time was more magical than ever. You see this time I truly had a little princess with me.

One of the things I find about Disneyland is that we can never be dressed right for the place. To elaborate further, this time my sleigh(read: bulky stroller) was loaded with woollen like it was truly travelling to and from the North Pole. We had gone when the low temperature in Bay area was hovering around 0 degrees celcius. So, we dressed in layers, took along additional jackets and coats that would have put an eskimo watching a polar bear in the cold to shame. Guess what? The day was so fine, we were hot in t-shirts and jeans! So, I spent a wonderful day in a wonderful land with a huge bag containing jackets strung across my back! This…when I had the foresight to check the weather prior to the trip, and the temperature indicated a low of 3 degrees celcius on the aforesaid day – sigh!

The last time I went was August of 2005, and we spent the majority of the day skulking around in the shade, and fanning ourselves with the disney map because the temperature hovered around 90 degrees fahrenheit! We got active only by 6p.m. and rushed from corner to corner after that.

While I always enjoyed the music at Disneyland, this time it was more meaningful because my daughter was singing all these songs at home, and for the first time I knew all the songs being sung! I gaped at the parade, and loudly sighed everytime I saw a character I knew my daughter would recognize. Kee was so excited with all the activity in the morning, that she fell into a deep slumber just as the parade started. The parade went like this:
” Oh .. see snow white. Oh no….kunju please get up. Oh..mickey mouse. Oh no…please get up”
I admire myself for mentioning said phrases for every set in the parade tirelessly much to the chagrin of folks around me. At one point, I thought the parade was going to stop, and Mickey would come by and say, “Don’t worry – she can see me in the evening, can’t she?!”

I even tried to pluck her eyelids open, but she wouldn’t budge. I call myself a dutiful mother because I wriggled through the crowds, and found her a spot on the dustbin where she could see the 6 p.m. parade from – then I stopped whining about her missing the parade.

To beat the crowd weaving out after the fireworks, we left before the fireworks, and asked a Disney employee how to get to our parking lot. She helpfully pointed us in exactly the opposite direction, and we ran and jumped into the trolley – daughter, stroller, bag of jackets, old parents and all. We realised what happened after reaching the destination, and doubled back to the park entrance. Now, we ran towards the right direction, this time without opening out the stroller. I don’t know why we did not think of opening the stroller, but my husband ran carrying the bulky stroller folded and held most uncomfortably. I shall have to save this for another blog, but there is no comfortable way to carry a stroller and a car seat!

I ran behind him carrying the following:
1) My 3 year old daughter who was in splits laughing. I don’t know why she found my predicament so amusing, maybe it felt like a bumpy safari – I would never know, but I couldn’t help laughing with her too!
2) A huge bag weighing around about the same as my daughter with the jackets for protecting us against the cold on my back. I must mention I was sweating profusely with all the running!
3) A camera
4) A handbag

I was running at a pretty decent pace. That explains why people were staring at me like I was an ostrich taking weight training and sprinting to an extreme!

Disney managed to spin its magic as always, and we reluctantly plucked ourselves away from the magical kingdom to the real world in the right trolley towards the right parking lot in splits of laughter that had other tired folks jealous.

Rant

What is it about Western clothes that I find boring?

Less than vibrant colours surely
Lack of prints
The racks and racks of the same thing neatly folded, or hung

If I go looking for a top, there are 4 racks with 5 different shades, same cut different sizes.

I miss the prints. I miss the radiant colours. I miss the agony of not knowing which print looks better than the other one. I feel bad for those millions of shoppers I see thronging the mall not knowing the variety they are missing everyday.

Dubai – A reminiscence!

I am very reluctantly back in the US after the most invigorating holiday I’ve taken in perhaps a whole decade. I visited my family in Dubai. While there, I could not help admiring the thought and planning that goes into making an inhospitable desert a place you would want to live in. The city has large expanses of greenery in state maintained parks, lots of trees and given that it is winter now, does not feel like a desert.

Just to give you a broad background of UAE. Seven emirates make up the UAE:

Abu Dhabi, Dubai, Sharjah, Ras Al Khaimah, Fujairah, Umm Al Quwain and Ajman. The emirates unite and elect a Prime Minister and President primarily for Foreign Affairs, but within the UAE, each of these Emirates is ruled by their respective Sheikhs. There is an election to the council, but the election of the PM and President is based on the Economic wealth of the Emirate. Therefore, currently the Abu Dhabi ruler is the PM and the Dubai ruler is the President (or vice-versa!)

There are some things that I must mention with respect to Dubai. I can’t classify them as anything other than musings:

1) The buildings are all nice looking. Most of them by themselves look good, but collectively they don’t gel all the time. For example I saw cases where there was a Hawa mahal-like palace near a very swanky looking modern building. It was like Noor Jahan linking hands with Madonna – bad analogy, but you get the picture.

2) The tunnels or bypass roads have both sides of the walls lined with tiles. These tiles somehow give an illusion of driving through a rather large bathroom corridor, but that’s just me!

3) Dubai is one of the few cities in the Middle East where purdah (i.e. the portion covering the face) is banned in Government offices. The women you see clad in robes do so of their own accord in this city.

4) The Arab nationals wear a spotless, clean WHITE robe. I was amazed to see not one of them had a crease or a speck of dirt on them. Apparently, my sister had the same doubt, and she asked somebody who works in an Arab family how they manage that. The lady confessed it is a full-time occupation just to clean the robes and maintain it at that sterling white at all times. If you ask me, you could pay a maid a month’s salary just for that! I was also wondering why the men wore white robes, while the women wore black robes in a desert.

5) Dubai is undergoing growth pangs like any other city that has tripled its population in the last 5 years. The metro railway is under construction, and the city has been dug up through all major roads. The vision is to promote suburban areas, and encourage people to commute to Dubai for work. While this is being implemented, roads are clogged and parking is a nightmare.

6) Citation required here: Apparently, when the temperature hits 50 C, all construction workers need to be given the day off. Officially, the temperature had gone up to 49.2, but not 50 quite yet 🙂

Just a pic of a signboard!

Highlights of my trip (not necessarily in the order mentioned below)
Desert Safari
Jet Skiing
Ibn Batuta Mall
Al Ain trip
Khor Fakkan
Shopping
Al Sooq Al Rasheed

The Ibn Batuta Mall:

The mall is built on a sprawling 1.6 million sq ft space with parking for 4000 cars available. The mall is themed after 6 different countries: China ,India ,Persia ,Egypt ,Tunisia , Andalusia. Walking proved enjoyable in the mall, but after a couple of hours we discovered we had only covered 4 countries, so we beat the retreat passing up the mall areas looking like the other countries.

Al Ain & Khor Fakkan:

The trip to both places involved driving through towns built around an oasis. The beauty of the place if definitely unlike any other I’ve seen, spotted with Arabian architecture (like huge lanterns, pots in the middle of the road!) The beach water is inviting and warm, and all of us had quite a time. It was at Khor Fakkan that we went jet-skiing for the first time. I remember it like it was yesterday – the sea breeze, the salt water spray, and then getting hit by another scooter, and tumbling head first into the Arabian Sea!

Desert Safari:

Here is the one of the gems on the crown of my visit. This was so amazing that I fear I cannot do justice with mere words and a badly taken video. The drive through the dunes was in a regular 4 wheel drive vehicle. Right before we hit the sand, the driver coolly deflated the tires, and my brother helpfully explained that this was to increase the surface area of contact to avoid toppling over the dunes during fast turns – gulp! Thankfully, we had my sister in the car who isn’t frightfully fond of automobiles. She would rather take a horse buggy than a car to get from point A to B, so you can imagine how she was on the safari! That made life simple for me: I just swallowed my apprehension and put on a brave face to keep her alive.


While on the safari, you have to trust the ability of the driver. If not, you just cannot enjoy the ride. The jeeps keep together in a large convoy, and space themselves enough so that if the car ahead of them skids, it does not crash into the next one. We got chatting with our driver Salim, a young Pakistani national who does this everyday for a living. He explained that there are 3 dunes that are slightly taller than the rest. So, their job is to follow these larger dunes, and turn right once you cross the third dune. As usual, I had to ask him what happens if we turn left?

Ans: You are doomed to die, and will be devoured by vultures by sunset the next day, if your troop doesn’t realise you are missing. But of course they would realise, and you would be rescued via helicopter, as a family was 2 weeks ago at 1 a.m. five hours into their ordeal. I explained to him that I have a three year old waiting for me to come home that night, so let’s turn right at the dune.

“Yes Ma’am” , he earnestly replied. Every time the tires turned left to avoid a rock or something, I yelped- “Right Salim, Right!”

What happens when a sandstorm comes along, and the height of the dunes change? Apparently, they survey and study the landscape again, before opening the route out to tourists. While on the trip, I had to admire the tenacity of the generations of humans who lived and prospered in the Arabian desert with nothing but the stars to guide them.

We watched the sun set over the dunes, and then moved to a desert camp with henna stalls, drinks and a Belly Dancer! This belly dancer was hugely talented, and controlled not ony her movements and her body, but also the crowd with her breath. The Arabian music was scintillating, and the Lebanese dancer’s movements made it an exhilarating experience. It didn’t help my bachelor brother that he was watching this belly dance with his two married sisters – but hey, he invited us over didn’t he?!

Al Sooq Al Rasheed:

Arabic has a soft spot for Q – pronounced as ‘KH’. I found it quite amusing that English has so few words in Q, while every sign post has at least one word starting or ending with ‘Q’. I digress : this Sooq is the famous gold bazaar. The gold bazaar was brimming with people, and here is the thing: not a single store had metal shutters for protection! Gold shopping in Dubai is an experience by itself. I am not very fond of jewellery – or so I thought till I saw the patterns. You can imagine what would happen when a person who likes gold goes there.

Shopping is a pleasant mix of shopping in India and in the US. It was only when was I packing up to leave did I realise that I had shopped quite a bit!

A vacation with loved ones would have been fun if it had been in Alps or Ranganathan Street in Madras or a quaint village near Trichy. Nevertheless, I was immensely glad I took a vacation in Dubai. All I have to do is think back, and I smile instantly – now, that’s what I call a good vacation!

Dubai – A reminiscence!

I am very reluctantly back in the US after the most invigorating holiday I’ve taken in perhaps a whole decade. I visited my family in Dubai. While there, I could not help admiring the thought and planning that goes into making an inhospitable desert a place you would want to live in. The city has large expanses of greenery in state maintained parks, lots of trees and given that it is winter now, does not feel like a desert.

Just to give you a broad background of UAE. Seven emirates make up the UAE:

Abu Dhabi, Dubai, Sharjah, Ras Al Khaimah, Fujairah, Umm Al Quwain and Ajman. The emirates unite and elect a Prime Minister and President primarily for Foreign Affairs, but within the UAE, each of these Emirates is ruled by their respective Sheikhs. There is an election to the council, but the election of the PM and President is based on the Economic wealth of the Emirate. Therefore, currently the Abu Dhabi ruler is the PM and the Dubai ruler is the President (or vice-versa!)

There are some things that I must mention with respect to Dubai. I can’t classify them as anything other than musings:

1) The buildings are all nice looking. Most of them by themselves look good, but collectively they don’t gel all the time. For example I saw cases where there was a Hawa mahal-like palace near a very swanky looking modern building. It was like Noor Jahan linking hands with Madonna – bad analogy, but you get the picture.

2) The tunnels or bypass roads have both sides of the walls lined with tiles. These tiles somehow give an illusion of driving through a rather large bathroom corridor, but that’s just me!

3) Dubai is one of the few cities in the Middle East where purdah (i.e. the portion covering the face) is banned in Government offices. The women you see clad in robes do so of their own accord in this city.

4) The Arab nationals wear a spotless, clean WHITE robe. I was amazed to see not one of them had a crease or a speck of dirt on them. Apparently, my sister had the same doubt, and she asked somebody who works in an Arab family how they manage that. The lady confessed it is a full-time occupation just to clean the robes and maintain it at that sterling white at all times. If you ask me, you could pay a maid a month’s salary just for that! I was also wondering why the men wore white robes, while the women wore black robes in a desert.

5) Dubai is undergoing growth pangs like any other city that has tripled its population in the last 5 years. The metro railway is under construction, and the city has been dug up through all major roads. The vision is to promote suburban areas, and encourage people to commute to Dubai for work. While this is being implemented, roads are clogged and parking is a nightmare.

6) Citation required here: Apparently, when the temperature hits 50 C, all construction workers need to be given the day off. Officially, the temperature had gone up to 49.2, but not 50 quite yet 🙂

Just a pic of a signboard!

Highlights of my trip (not necessarily in the order mentioned below)
Desert Safari
Jet Skiing
Ibn Batuta Mall
Al Ain trip
Khor Fakkan
Shopping
Al Sooq Al Rasheed

The Ibn Batuta Mall:

The mall is built on a sprawling 1.6 million sq ft space with parking for 4000 cars available. The mall is themed after 6 different countries: China ,India ,Persia ,Egypt ,Tunisia , Andalusia. Walking proved enjoyable in the mall, but after a couple of hours we discovered we had only covered 4 countries, so we beat the retreat passing up the mall areas looking like the other countries.

Al Ain & Khor Fakkan:

The trip to both places involved driving through towns built around an oasis. The beauty of the place if definitely unlike any other I’ve seen, spotted with Arabian architecture (like huge lanterns, pots in the middle of the road!) The beach water is inviting and warm, and all of us had quite a time. It was at Khor Fakkan that we went jet-skiing for the first time. I remember it like it was yesterday – the sea breeze, the salt water spray, and then getting hit by another scooter, and tumbling head first into the Arabian Sea!

Desert Safari:

Here is the one of the gems on the crown of my visit. This was so amazing that I fear I cannot do justice with mere words and a badly taken video. The drive through the dunes was in a regular 4 wheel drive vehicle. Right before we hit the sand, the driver coolly deflated the tires, and my brother helpfully explained that this was to increase the surface area of contact to avoid toppling over the dunes during fast turns – gulp! Thankfully, we had my sister in the car who isn’t frightfully fond of automobiles. She would rather take a horse buggy than a car to get from point A to B, so you can imagine how she was on the safari! That made life simple for me: I just swallowed my apprehension and put on a brave face to keep her alive.


While on the safari, you have to trust the ability of the driver. If not, you just cannot enjoy the ride. The jeeps keep together in a large convoy, and space themselves enough so that if the car ahead of them skids, it does not crash into the next one. We got chatting with our driver Salim, a young Pakistani national who does this everyday for a living. He explained that there are 3 dunes that are slightly taller than the rest. So, their job is to follow these larger dunes, and turn right once you cross the third dune. As usual, I had to ask him what happens if we turn left?

Ans: You are doomed to die, and will be devoured by vultures by sunset the next day, if your troop doesn’t realise you are missing. But of course they would realise, and you would be rescued via helicopter, as a family was 2 weeks ago at 1 a.m. five hours into their ordeal. I explained to him that I have a three year old waiting for me to come home that night, so let’s turn right at the dune.

“Yes Ma’am” , he earnestly replied. Every time the tires turned left to avoid a rock or something, I yelped- “Right Salim, Right!”

What happens when a sandstorm comes along, and the height of the dunes change? Apparently, they survey and study the landscape again, before opening the route out to tourists. While on the trip, I had to admire the tenacity of the generations of humans who lived and prospered in the Arabian desert with nothing but the stars to guide them.

We watched the sun set over the dunes, and then moved to a desert camp with henna stalls, drinks and a Belly Dancer! This belly dancer was hugely talented, and controlled not ony her movements and her body, but also the crowd with her breath. The Arabian music was scintillating, and the Lebanese dancer’s movements made it an exhilarating experience. It didn’t help my bachelor brother that he was watching this belly dance with his two married sisters – but hey, he invited us over didn’t he?!

Al Sooq Al Rasheed:

Arabic has a soft spot for Q – pronounced as ‘KH’. I found it quite amusing that English has so few words in Q, while every sign post has at least one word starting or ending with ‘Q’. I digress : this Sooq is the famous gold bazaar. The gold bazaar was brimming with people, and here is the thing: not a single store had metal shutters for protection! Gold shopping in Dubai is an experience by itself. I am not very fond of jewellery – or so I thought till I saw the patterns. You can imagine what would happen when a person who likes gold goes there.

Shopping is a pleasant mix of shopping in India and in the US. It was only when was I packing up to leave did I realise that I had shopped quite a bit!

A vacation with loved ones would have been fun if it had been in Alps or Ranganathan Street in Madras or a quaint village near Trichy. Nevertheless, I was immensely glad I took a vacation in Dubai. All I have to do is think back, and I smile instantly – now, that’s what I call a good vacation!

Happy Diwali!

The legend goes that Diwali is celebrated to honour the return of Rama with his wife Sita (after vanquishing Ravana) to Ayodhya. The legend also states that Rama after vanquishing Ravana refused to take Sita back as his wife, and she was upset and cleansed herself in fire, emerging unscathed to prove she was pure. Evidently when they got back to Ayodhya, they weren’t on the best of the terms. We celebrate Diwali anyway.

Another legend goes that Sita gave birth to 2 sons Lava and Kusha, and something happened in the form of a row, and Mother Earth swallowed Sita yet again.

As a human race, we tend to not speak evil of the dead. I can well imagine how Rama became Lord Rama over time, giving us yet another excuse to eat and make merry.

Well … I don’t know how or when Diwali started. I do know that it was one of my favourite festivals. I grew up in a residential school, and most holidays were not declared holidays in our school. Diwali was. (Well…what would you do with 750 children on campus if there were declared holidays for every festival? ) It was also one of the opportunities to wear new clothes, and attend the Diwali puja in School. 10th and 12th grade students wore sarees and dhotis, and I can’t tell you how wonderful the whole scene looked.

Diwali is here again. Celebrations have been pushed to the week-end for those of us who don’t have declared holidays on Diwali.

Happy Diwali Folks!

Burglar Alarms

I have a car remote that has a mind of its own. It decides when it wants to work. I went grocery shopping the other day. Not my favorite kind I assure you.

The grocers had a store-full of stuff I needed, or rather my house-keeping has fallen on bad days. All on a sudden I was spotting a trend to anything I wanted to make. I would suggest a dish, and then realise one tiny but important ingredient is missing. So, I would happily switch to another dish without batting an eyelid. When that happens thrice the same day, the mind’s eye discerns a trip to the grocers. I don’t know how my car senses my mood, but it seemed reluctant to go along as well.

I digress..but the point of the matter is, I came back with bags hanging from very limb (also 1 bag per finger on the hand) and attempted to open the car, and it wouldn’t budge. I tried from every angle, and it refused to emit the necessary rays. Another sigh, and I finally opened the car manually.

It was totally unresponsive to my remote, and when I opened it manually, it screamed and shrieked and shook violently. Well…not really, the car alarm went off, but the screaming, shrieking and shaking pretty much summed up my reactions in the parking lot. I finally cajoled it into staying quiet, but it whimpered.

“Blip Blip” it said every 2 minutes and started the alarm again.

I attempted to show it my face, and say –
“See, this is me, you idiot! You see me everyday! Stop wailing!”

When the nerves are wracked, it takes a while to reset the burglar alarm, and by the time I had figured out how to do it, cops from San Francisco, Los Angeles and San Diego were piling into their cars. I exaggerate but you get the drift.

A month ago, my dear friend’s car was stolen from his community. The same model as the one I was pleading and cajoling with. Apparently, that car went without a squeak! Why did that car not go crazy? Or maybe the car thief knew exactly how to turn the burglar alarm off before the sirens wailed.

SIGH! Remind me why burglar alarms are there again?!

Surprise !!

Keeping surprises and I have a certain .. well, “relationship”. I can’t keep them. Its spiteful, the way they insist on tumbling out of my mouth the moment I try to keep one.

This time, ‘Determined’ was the word. Not one slip of the tongue – even if it means less communication at home. These surprises have played with me long enough for me to take some stern action.

I know my shortcomings, and consequently NEVER plan surprise b’day parties – I’d probably be asking the b’day boy/girl the menu. I decided to start small – a surprise birthday gift would do. I went online, and decided to buy my husband some books for his birthday. We both use the same Amazon account, and I figured the books would come soon enough.

I ordered the gifts, and came home every evening looking for the parcel from Amazon. The birthday came and went, but there was no sign of the books.

A week later, and still nothing.

How long can a sane person keep a surprise?! Left with no choice, I called my husband, and asked how long Amazon delivery usually takes. He told me what I already knew – max a week.

“Why?” he asked
“Oh .. umm nothing..I … er … just wanted to know. My friend asked me – so I ..er.. told her I’ll ask you” *How LAME?*

You can imagine the strain on my nervous system by now. I was twitching and fidgeting with every doorbell. I could take this no more – a person needs peace. This just wouldn’t do! So, I checked Amazon, and the site confirmed that I had cancelled my order.

What the >$#$#)%? I never cancelled the order. I have been looking forward to those books so much now – my head was reaching bursting point.

So, I called the old husband again, and put on my interrogative hat. For those of you who are new to interrogative techniques, let me assist you:

First the gentle prodding:
Me: Honey… Do you have anything to say about Amazon?
He: It’s a great site isn’t it? I saw something you might like. Just click on..

I cut the conv. short – I was piqued and desperate to get to the bottom of the matter. I also adopted the curt tone for added measure
Me: No….I mean, did you do anything with an Amazon order 15 days ago?
He: No…why would I do anything with an Amazon order? Hey…just check out what I am showing you…

An edgier tone is warranted. It helps if you also clear your throat once or twice to signal how dire the situation is
Me: *Clears throat*. REALLY! Did you or did you not cancel an order 15 days ago? I’d ordered 2 books
He: Oh…was it you who ordered those? I thought I had added them to the shopping cart by mistake and cancelled them

Cool as a cucumber!

All these days my nerves on end, and this cutlet went and cancelled the order without a squeak!

“Why would you do that?” I shrieked. “I bought them to surprise you for your birthday!”

“Oh” – Is that a response, I ask you. Is that a response?

NO MORE SURPRISES!