Ms Malamoji
“ I love the range of emojis we have at our disposal!” I said beaming at the children, as I texted one of my friends for an evening walk, sipped a cup of tea and impressively ignored what they were watching on the television.
🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃🌿🍀🍂🍃
The daughter peered into the phone, and had a closed off expression that reminded me of geese trying not to laugh.
“Mother! How long have you been using that emoji while inviting people for walks?” she asked. This time, it was unmistakable. The dam of laughter waiting to burst.
“I use it all the time. Such a pretty one it is for windy evening walks, no?” I said admiring the little emoji in question. Leaves being whipped up by the winds. 🍃
“Ummm…yeah! Luckily, you text other … ummm … Aunties with this I guess!” she said.
“Well! Why not? I put different emojis for different things!” I said, though I could feel the prickling sensation that meant I was going to have the carpet not gently removed but swiveled out from under my feet.
“Nothing! Just the emoji you just used – *pause for dramatic effect* – means – well, you know, come while we whirl and twirl, you know, up there?” she said, raising her eyebrows, holding in a laugh, and shaking with it, all at the same time. She was giving me what authors call ‘meaningful looks’. It was honestly impressive. They should have an emoji for that. I looked like a pile of leaves twirling in the wind myself – confused.
She waited for me to catch on, and when I didn’t, said, “Mother! That emoji means you want to get *high* – not with alcohol but marijuana!”
I gasped.
“NO! How could that be?! How come no one ever told me before then?! I love that emoji and use it all the time!”
“Like I said – your friends are all … goodies!” (delivery with laughter)
I felt like Ms Malamoji.
( Ms Malaprop – you have my sympathies. Malapropism is the use of a slightly similar sounding word with an entirely different meaning, usually having a comedic effect. It is attributed to Ms Malaprop – a character in a 18th century play who used this and made the audience laugh. (Ex: Miss Pringle often does this in Miss Read’s Fairacre series) )
Skibbidi Toilet
“Ugh! This is like that skibbidi toilet thing all over again!” I said to the son later as I recounted it.
“Ugh! Amma – Keep with the times. Skibidi toilet is so 2023! It’s honestly cringe if you say that now!”
Author commentary: Where are we writers to go if phrases become ‘cringe’ in a matter of months? Sigh.
Also, for my friends who don’t know what Skibbidi Toilet means: here it is. It is a web-series where humanoids have a war with singing human-headed toilets.
🙄 I know. (That is the rolling eyes emoji – I think)
It was all the rage among the simple minded laugh-sters in our midst – two years ago.
Nourish-n-Cherish 